My life in UK.......

2 years living in Uk is not so long as i had first imagine..bt what i had gone thru these 2 years is not totally bitter yet most of the time i did feel loneliness...

bt i really feel i am the lucky one can come here and if i was given the second chance i would choose to come here without hesitation ...

this is the place where i lost my confidence the most and this is the place where i had struggle to abandon my kia su attitude in order to keep myself sane when come to exam...bt at the end my effort paid and i had graduated with second upper...never in my life feel so happy when receiving the result ...most of the time i only felt that that was the result i was obliged to get in order not to disappoint my parents.. (weird?? i feel the same too..hihi)

there was one time my confidence was so low that i had intended to run away from manchester with any method i could ...as all these year my confidence came mainly from my good perfirmance in academy..that is the only way i had excell compare to other throughout my growing path...
bt i could not confide to anyone ard me as they all were so good in result they gt and they just could not really understand how hard for me to accept the truth..how dump i had become..
Not only that bt also i cant really mix well with people surronunding me evrytime went out 'socialising'...either in pub or party..
i was not really i at the time ..i was too quiet, i always nod my head and evrytime ppl approach me to speak i would think is he talking to me or just wana gt to know my best buddy...it is only when i spent my holiday in newcastle and gt to know a new bunch of frens that is the time i realise that people with different character tend to mix tgt..and one dun have to be excell in academy in order to have confidence..just be urself and i dun have to please anyone or care for what they think abt me..if u wanna ppl to like you first you must care them with your true heart.
though i am still clumsy in caring other, in showing my concern, and expressing my thought, i am better now..thanks to my parent who never give me up when i was so depressed at that time..luckily never go into depression..=)

and i had grown up,,from a little gal blur in all things,especially in direction to a person who is now expert in looking map!!haha, that is because i was forced to bring my parents ard paris and london without any assistance from others, while at the same time have to think thousand ways of saving money and making sure my parents were comfortable during the journey..luckily all went smo0thly wihout having any big trouble..bt i realise that my mum and sister has changed a lot ..my mum hate travelling bt she din complain much this time as she can sense my tense i suppose ,.n my little sister has turned mature so much that she is the one cheer me up and shared my worry ..love my family so much though i always hope my parent can express their love in more overt way..may be it is the culture problem..n i do envy those old english couple who still hold each other's hand so tightly..oo..their love seem so deep to each!!so lovely !!

oo..above is my graduation photo..pictures paint thousand words, so i save my breath not in elaborating my feeling>>>hihi

My korkor..

he alway so successful, always so determined to do one thing, always noe how to handle the stress...though i am not as excellent as him, i wish i can own half of his determination ...choon a , jia you!! i dun wannna succumb to the fear..not when i havent start to fight ...

...............

always wish there is someone can accompany me to study until midnight..
always hope someone can be there to push me to study more when i am lazy..
always wish someone can like my kor always inspire me to face my fear,,but now he seem like always busy with his job..
always wish there is someone like my mum prepare food for me when i facing the exam..

i know i cant be too greedy now..all i need to do is bear with it 8 more months..

all i want now is just a simple word can do-gambate,,but y some ppl dun understand, or they have their own way of expressing it n it is just me cant grasp it....

long time din blog ...dun noe whnat to tell..lazy to upload photos as well..now busy preparing for my revision ..stressful...as usual, i am kind of lost now cz not enough time to study..my frens coming to find me , which is a good thing but i just too scare when they go back i will back to the cruel reality..so must study more before they come..

this few days busy too,...first is my da ka jie's graduation, then folowed by ytd xmas dinner..celebrated it earlier cz one fren going back today..so for 3 consecutive days i had beem eating, eating n eating....=) n my da ka jie brought me to the proper italian restaurant to treat me...i think so far is one of the most expensive dinner i had ..haha,,the funny part was we ordered to much food..after the starter, which is 2 soups n one plate full wiht fried seafood and meat , we aldy felt full n we couldnt finihs our main course ..ai, so no space keep fpr dessert..=(

but aft celebration , now dunnoe why feel empty, maybe i am kind of tired of handling all the things by myself...the week b4 i was sick the whole week..first was the sorethroat, followed by fever n cough..then stomachache for 2 continuing days..cant sleep for 2 night n eventually broke down n cried at 4am...so funny, i think i may gt some serious disease..haha, my imagination is good enough..may be i read too many cases concering clinical negligence..bt just too scare cz dun now what wrong with me and i dun dare to tell my family//..

that week warn me how precious my health is..

now i am totally recover..n i am continuing back my bad habit..sleep ard 4 smt..that iss bcz exam coming..n i have no choice..just pray hard my sorethroat n fever wont come back ...

oya..the picture was taken in oslo with my da ka jia..will upload it aft exam ..paiseh, tey, really no time to upload..

this exam is very important to me..it decides what grade i will get..i dun wann crash the hope i have ..i hope i wil be strong enough to meet my fear...jia you to me =)

My apolozy to my frens



sorry ,i really mean it to those friends who i have neglected...especially xinyi , eleanor, and many more...i have been tried many times to log in to this page but forgot the password and that y delayed till now..



el, promise will find u the next timei go back...sorry ///

n tey, thanks for the song...u always send me the song at the right timing..as now i am getting bored with the song in my computer..



I dunnoe what happend to me last few months but sometimes i felt lazy to take initiatives to contact people...as i always hope people will contact me first instead...so after few attempts to call ppl , to email them then i will start to give up cz i gt upset easily...My ego...-_-
what kind of ego is that???/
(EMmmmmmm????..hihi)



okie..will try hard to change that..



well, this year in manchester life is pretty happening...next monday will go to prague, later will go to Oslo, norway and may be later will go to visit my da kar che in birmingham!!!

so life wont be as boring as last year..



but y i still feel so empty in my heart >???i have been tried to mix around n socialise more and talk to more ppl but now i feel suddenly i am bored with who i am now...

someone told me :be urself n u dun really need to force myself to mix ard with the people u feel not really comfortable with



bt my another fren told me that since i am going ot be a lawyer, this is the socialising skill which u need to equip urself with this socialicing skill



start to picture how my future may be ???i wanna be a successful carreer woman with high confidence abt myself or just wanna be happy n find a nice guy maybe?

i am not so high ambition now..just wanna concentrate on my study and travel more perhaps..

this is the thing that i have some control over..stop day-dreaming!!=)

My working experiences...

this week will be my 5th week working in legal firm..
well, overall the experience is great as meet lots of people with different characters ..some of them are funny, outspoken, talkative or hardworking , smart or caring persons ...


really learn lots ...and expose me earlier to the adult's world as well as the legal occupation..and manage to get a deeper insight in it but it also at the same time make me wonder am i suitable to be a solicitor?

chambering students all need to work till at least 8-9pm and that is considered as the minimum working time for them//....this idea really intimidate me..and there are always tonnes of deadlines and format u have to comply with...omg, i really cant imagine how am i going to counter this by the time i become chambering student...-_-

then the next question will be am i choosing the right subject to study???well, i wld say that law is still pretty interesting , just that the workload is really heavy..

and as a chambering or attachment student normally we cant choose the works to do..so even it is a brainless work u have to do..

yeah, aft attachment wanan enjoy my holiday...will go to pigpig in singapore i guess..hopefully tey can go as well, then 3 of us can gather after such a long time we din gather ...now my holiday left abt one month and actually i am quite reluctant to go back...i can foresee i need to work really hard in order to push my grade up...so CANT LEPAK ANYMORE..

oya...there is still some exciting thing waitign me ahead..i will be the purplr people..haha..so glad that i can be one of the members,,i will try my best to assist other and hopefully can help the new students like last time how the purple people help me...but really i a bit worry given anyone who know me well will know that i have no sense of direction...how if i lead the new students to the wrong place ???/-_-'

god, pls dun let it happen///....=O

k, write till here..